Whose Body Is This, Anyway?

Not Me But Great Outfit!

Serial blogger that I am, I've ruthlessly abandoned--at least temporarily--my older blogs, GrandeDameIt and Jigger of Gin to wander into yet a different territory. I suppose I could post about fitness and health on GrandeDameIt but it just seems so wrong to mix fit and fashion (and forget using Jigger of Gin for musings on health, although I certainly like a healthy slug of gin as much as the next person).

After the small apologia above, I now get to today's real lecture:
How can I possibly be a Personal Trainer when I'm so friggin' out of shape myself?

Well, I've narrowed it down to four reasons or, like a Monty Python sketch, maybe five:
1. I'm a post-menopausal woman (I guess to be post-menopausal you kind of have to be a woman, huh). After a certain age, your body no longer belongs solely to you; it belongs to your hormones or lack thereof. Body has no respect for the number of seconds you can hold a plank or the number of pints of Jeni's ice cream you avoid. Body says "You are old. You will have more belly fat than an arctic Walrus."

2. I did write a blog called Jigger of Gin. I think that's self-explanatory. Drinking is not the best way to have six-pack abs despite that entirely misleading terminology; it is a great way to have a beer belly.

3. I spend so much time reading about how to work out effectively and eat healthily and so much time planning my clients' workouts using an iPhone app that just makes it irresistible to build the most kick-ass routine for them that I don't have time to work out myself.

4. I strained my back moving a large table top into my new office because I had too much pride in my biceps to ask for help. So there.

5. I'm lazy.

I promise *snort* that I'll do better--both exercising and blogging. Next up: How to Hate Your Gut but Love Your Body.